Life Changes and Life Lessons.

Monday Mutiny | April 8th, 2024: Happy Monday. Below are five things that challenged, motivated, or entertained me this past week—hopefully they will do the same for you.

(1) For starters, I spent most of last week in NYC, where I was a guest on Elvis Duran and the Morning Show (you can listen to my segment here if you’re interested; I believe I come on around 1:35:20). Even though I’ve taken a step back from social media, I haven’t become a total hermit (yet). All in all, I had a good time in New York—and, yes, I felt the earthquake that everybody was talking about—but the most memorable part of my trip was the night before the quake, when I met up with a relatively new friend. We’d never actually met in person, but we connected online a year or so ago because we’re both writers and we talk often about books, ideas, serial killers, travel, and just random observations about the state of the world.

Anyway, the reason why going out that last night in NYC was so memorable for me was because it was so familiar—eerily so. For a moment, it felt like I had stepped back in time, and everything that has transpired over the past five years of my life was non-existent. It was dream-like, and I don’t know that I’ve ever felt something quite like that before.

There, in the commotion of a Midtown bar, I was sucked into a time-warp. I was immediately taken back to my life pre-2019, back to a time when I, myself, lived in New York City and spent the majority of my nights out and about—hopping from bar to bar as the life of the party, drunk and without direction, having short encounters and conversations with individuals that I’d never see again—all while trying to conceal the fact that I was dreadfully lonely in a city with a population of more than eight million. And, for a few hours last week, I felt exactly as I did back then, the same way that I had felt throughout most of my twenties and early thirties: alone.

So, when it came time to call it a night, as I walked back into my smaller-than-remembered Manhattan hotel room, I wanted nothing more than to be home, lying on my couch, with my son snuggled under my arm, watching a show about dinosaurs.

I had a taste of my old life, and I didn’t want it. Not even a little bit.

Over the years, my life has gone through a series of profound changes—as I’m sure many of you have experienced as well—and, currently, I’m going through another significant change, a change that wasn’t planned or chosen (at least not intentionally), but I’ve never wanted to live the same life forever. And, when I allow myself to step back and look at the bigger picture, I’m grateful for every change and interruption that has come my way—the good, the bad, the great, and even the downright painful—because they’ve all led me to a new life, a new chapter, and a new version of myself, a version that is almost always better than before.

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(2) On my flight home, I watched this movie called “The Lesson” from 2023. And, if you enjoy movies that are a slow burn, more thematic than action-packed, you’ll probably like it. Personally, I thought it was a super original premise regarding the emotions of grief and envy—but it also happens to be a story about writers, so perhaps I’m more connected to it than the average viewer.

However, regardless of my personal draw to the movie, I can say with confidence that it was ten times better than that terrible “Road House” remake. I mean, I see what they tried to do with it, but it’s absolutely unwatchable shit. The original works too well. Name a better duo than Patrick Swayze and Sam Elliot—that’s right, you can’t.

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(3) I read this passage from a book, and it hit me like a fucking brick.

“Nothing in this world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty. No kind of life is worth leading if it is always an easy life . . . I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life; I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well.”

—Theodore Roosevelt (American Ideals: And Other Essays, Social and Political)

(4) While I waited in the airport lounge at JFK—lying on a couch with my face covered because, well, let’s face it: I was hungover from the night before—I was asked by an older gentleman if he could join me. The lounge was pretty full at this point and I was taking up a lot of space, so I sat upright and we got to talking.

Turns out, he was a retired Broadway actor—and although our lives were/are separated by more than thirty years—we had a lot in common. We talked for two hours (I almost forgot that I had a flight to catch) about pretty much everything: food, architecture, dogs, horses, tattoos, social media, travel, and, most importantly, the power of good storytelling.

My favorite book as a kid, The Count of Monte Cristo, just so happened to be his favorite play to perform on Broadway—he, himself, playing the main character, Edmond Dantès—betrayed by a best friend and driven to seek revenge.

As he and I talked, I thought to myself, “Damn, what an interesting life this dude has lived.” Chances are, he may have thought the same about me. And, that right there, is the reason why I love airports so much: you really never know who you’re going to meet—especially when you’re willing to move your feet in order to make room for somebody else to take a seat. I think life works the same way: If you create space, you never know who will show up to fill it.

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(5) Well, one of the cats just caught a bunny in the backyard while I was writing this—and the contractor showed up to replace some dry wall above the kitchen cabinets—so, I need to go handle some “life” stuff now . . . You know the saying: “Life, it comes at you fast—and even faster when you have a bloodthirsty cat.” But, seriously, if there’s one thing that I’ve learned over my thirty-seven years on this planet, it’s the fact that life changes when you least expect it. And, when it changes, your expectations of life, and yourself, are what make all the difference.

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Thanks for subscribing,

-Kyle, aka “The Capt.”

P.S. If you find yourself in Florida later this month, I’ll be at Dunes Brewing on April 25th for a book signing, Q+A, and whatever else we can fit into the schedule. You can get your ticket(s) HERE—and I hope to see you there.

P.P.S. I will soon be removing my book Speech Therapy from Amazon. So, if you’ve been wanting a copy, you’ll want to buy one before the end of the month.